Saturday, February 5, 2011

Gump's Thoughts On Waitangi

Expect a shit-storm at Waitangi's NZ Day celebrations this weekend - and amazingly nothing to do with Hone Harawira's Last Stand against the Maori Party!
A health warning's been issued over faecal contamination in the Bay of Islands. Last weekend's record rainfall caused several sewage spills and caused massive overflows of farm effluent, run-off and septic tanks.
So, bro, no eating shellfish from inner harbours and coastal areas around Northland for the next 28 days, no swimming either and, as for the 20 waka taking part in races, the paddlers should shower as soon as they come ashore.
With thousands converging on the area, the Green Party's raising a stink, calling the shit-uation "unacceptable": "People at Waitangi celebrations will be robbed of traditional swimming, jumping off the bridge and eating local seafood."
Te Tii Marae, already in the poo for koha extortion attempts, is shitting tacks about dropping seafood from its menu. Spokesman Kingi Taurua: "We're very disappointed and angry. We rely on (the ocean) to feed our guests and this will disrupt our plans." He said the decision may reflect badly on the Ngapuhi tribe. Er, why? Ever heard of Host Responsibility? Do you want your guests sick? Ok, so now you can't just waltz out into the bay and score tons of free kai - if you want it, you'll have to buy it like the rest of us. Hey, I've got a brainwave: you could use the $1000 koha already paid by oh-so-politically-correct TVNZ!
Gump is Da Man!
Greens co-leader Russel Norman says: "This shameful disruption to Waitangi Day is a line in the sand.
Enough is enough. We need clean water rules without delay."

Oh puh-leez! Rules won't stop the rain! Unless the Greens have a hotline to God, they should ease up on the political pointscoring. Just tough it out - like everyone else.
As legendary sage Forrest Gump once mused: "It happens. Shit. Sometimes."

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